Yes, you read the title of this blog post correctly. There is absolutely no closure in grief. Now, I’m going to explain, stay with me throughout this blog post…
The Grief is always there. The definition of “closure” is resolve and/or conclusion. The foundation of all grief is loss and with loss, there’s never resolve or conclusion. Every day you will wonder what could have been and that creates a trigger for your loss and then your grief shows up, just as heavy as it was yesterday and it will be tomorrow. Grief doesn’t have closure.
The love always remains. The love is both your solace and the greatest pain that you have. It’s impossible to have closure on all that love. Often I am asked – what do I do with all this love? You give it to yourself. You give it to the loved ones you have around you and you give it to honor the loss you have had.
You will wonder how it could’ve been
Every day I think – “What would Chloe be doing?” “ I wish I could call my mom?”. These are difficult realizations to have and I have wondered on a daily basis. I struggle with wondering. I struggle to understand that I won’t ever know what would have been. There is no closure in wondering.
There’s no replacement
If I had a dollar for every single time someone told me I should have another baby. Now here’s the deal, many women have babies after losing their infant(s) but they are not doing it to replace. It’s a choice to live a worthy life. It’s a choice to embrace life. Just like those who have lost their significant other/spouse/ partner – there is no replacing but they do choose to have love in their lives. And while there is no replacement, there is definitely choosing to go forward in life versus staying in the past of no closure or resolve.
This is the why
Although you cannot get closure in grief, there is no conclusion or resolve, there is choosing to live your very best life! This, in fact, is the greatest part of self-love. That, even without closure – the love remains and allows you to live the best life that you can! It’s your choice, but ask yourself? What’s closure? Do you need closure? or are you ok living with all the love that remains?
I am here to support you any way I can. Come join the Private AfterChloe Facebook Group by clicking here
Love & grace