Today I heard from one of my lifelong Sister friends (I’ve been friends with both her and her sister, most of our lives) that her grandmother wasn’t doing well and they both said well she’s 96 but to think of saying goodbye to her is sad and hard. Immediately my eyes welled up with tears. I promptly responded with “its never enough time… it’s never long enough.”
This led me to this blog post …
Recently in the past year, I’ve watched a few of my best friends face the aging of their parent and/or grandparent and what comes to my mind is that it’ll never be enough. No preparation can prepare you to say goodbye to the soul that gave you life. I believe we choose our parents, I really do. I believe that the bond between a parent and child surpasses life and death. It’s embedded in us and for this reason, it’s never enough. We cannot imagine our reactions to the loss of our loved ones. The individuals that are a part of us. The harshness and finality of death is that we don’t seem to know how to go forward, that we don’t know how to move … forward or backward. We stay in this state of disbelief and the feeling that we didn’t have enough time, enough memories and that it won’t ever be long enough.
We won’t ever understand why Loss has happened to us but it’s important to understand that, although it’s never long enough, yet we still hold on to the love that remains. With that understanding, we also recognize that it’s never long enough. We won’t ever be ok with losing a loved one but when we gain understanding we are able to move forward as quickly as we are able to. What this means is your pace, not anyone else’s.
It’s never long enough to stop grieving…
Yup, I wrote this and I mean it with all of my soul. The loss of someone that you love, you won’t ever get over it. It’ll never be long enough. It’ll seem like an eternity and just like yesterday. Believe in yourself, believe in the process, and remind yourself this isn’t anyone else’s journey. It’s never long enough.
What happens now?
So we know it’s never long enough but begin with this- allow yourself time and allow yourself the ability to let go of everyone else’s expectations. This is your journey.
A simple task for you to start by answering these two questions daily is gain self-awareness…
How do I feel today?
And can I do one thing to bring myself happiness?
Starting here with these questions and gaining the answers will help you to find your way moment by moment and it’s my hope that after reading this blog, you understand that it’s ok that it’s never long enough!
I would love to support you, I am giving 30-minute Zoom sessions for the month of February, you get to keep the recording and you can click here to schedule for the month of February.
Also, come get support by joining After Chloe’s Private Facebook Group by clicking here
Love and grace